Thursday, April 21, 2011

Some jokes to brighten your day:

LIPSTICK IN SCHOOL

According to a news report, a certain private school in Washington was recently faced with a unique problem...

A number of 12-year-old girls were beginning to use lipstick and would put it on in the bathroom. That was fine, but after they put on their lipstick, they would press their lips to the mirror leaving dozens of little lip prints.

Every night the maintenance man would remove them, and the next day the girls would put them back. Finally the principal decided that something had to be done. She called all the girls to the bathroom and met them there with the maintenance man.

She explained that all these lip prints were causing a major problem for the custodian who had to clean the mirrors every night. (you can just imagine the yawns from the little princesses).

To demonstrate how difficult it had been to clean the mirrors, she asked the maintenance man to show the girls how much effort was required.

He took out a long-handled squeegee, dipped it in the toilet, and cleaned the mirror with it. Since then, there have been no lip prints on the mirror.


There are teachers ... and then there are educators.

Judge: Why did you shoot your wife instead of shooting her lover?

Defendant: Your Honour, it is easier to shoot a woman once than shooting one man every week

Position of a Husband Is just like a Split Air Conditioner No matter however Loud he is in the Outdoor He is designed to remain Silent indoor...

"Husband is one who is the head of the family, but his wife is the neck, and whichever way she turns, he goes."


A man in Hell asked Devil: Can I make a call to my Wife? After making call he asked how much to pay.

Devil : Nothing, Hell to hell is Free


GOD SAID, "I CANNOT BE EVERYWHERE, SO I CREATED MOTHER".
DEVIL REPLIED, "EVEN I CANNOT BE EVERYWHERE , SO I CREATED MOTHER-IN-LAW "!!


Employees of a Company are all worried. Some are roaming around. Some are in loud discussions during office time. Some Trainees, who had just joined, notice this and enquire about what happened from a senior employee, they ask, "What's going on?"

"Terrorists have kidnapped our boss. They're asking for Rs.10 Crores ransom, otherwise they're going to douse him with petrol and set him on fire.We're going from desk to desk, taking up collection.

"One Trainee asks, “How much is everyone giving, on average?"About 1 Litre"


Friend #1: Are you visiting us tomorrow? Do you need directions?
Friend #2: I'm all set. I have the address, a GPS, and a GPS override.
Friend #1: What's a GPS override?
Friend #2: My wife


Wife : You changed after marriage.
Husband:
I've told you before that I am not interested in Married women.

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