When asked whether it’s OK to lie to one’s partner most of us would probably instinctively and emphatically say absolutely not, reasoning that honesty is not only an important part of a healthy relationship, but arguably one of the most important parts of a healthy relationship. But take a step back and think for a moment, and you’re probably also apt to recall instances when there just was no “up” side to telling the truth. Girls, how often have you needed to be less than honest with your man? Let’s look at 10 reasons why women lie to their men:
- Perhaps the biggest reason a woman will lie to her boyfriend is to spare his feelings. If she is convinced that the guy simply can’t handle the truth, a girl is likely to hold back or embellish something for the sake of his fragile ego.
- Withholding information about her past isn’t necessarily bad, or even deceitful. If it’s something that is only pertinent to the past and has no bearing on your future or your current relationship, then there’s no need to bring it up now. Leave it in the past where it belongs.
- A woman may not tell her boyfriend something that she thinks would cause him to worry, such as her travel habits. Some guys, for instance, can’t deal with a girl who is independent and has no problem venturing out on her own now and then. So she might want to keep the fact that she does her grocery shopping after midnight to herself, so as not to alarm her protective boyfriend.
- Trust is a two-way street, and not something that is easy to come by. While we may think of lying as a violation of that trust, it’s also true that we need to fully be able to trust someone before we can share sensitive information openly with them. Fibbing may just be a function of holding back something until she feels comfortable enough to share it.
- Regarding trust, it’s also possible that a woman will want to test a man by telling him a lie. It may be done to see if he can keep a secret, or it could be to gauge his level of tolerance or open-mindedness. Whatever the reason, a fib may be the litmus test she uses to sample a man’s emotional or psychological makeup, and not done simply to deceive him.
- A woman will sometimes respond in a situation that ‘it’s OK’, or ‘I’m fine’ when in fact neither is the case. These responses usually come when she simply isn’t convinced that she can engage her man in a prolonged meaningful discussion about what’s really on her mind, or isn’t quite ready to discuss the situation with him and is looking for a way to brush it off.
- Because women communicate differently than their male counterparts they often times use body language and nuance to augment their words and sometimes may say something verbally that they don’t really mean whole-heartedly. This is usually done with the (often mistaken) expectation that the man can discern the difference.
- As with men, women may lie about what they really want because they actually don’t know the true answer to that question themselves. Fear may be the motivating factor behind making up a response, whether it’s the fear of rejection, ridicule for not knowing, or simply for being indecisive.
- If the subject being discussed is one that has come up in a past relationship, and she gave honest opinion then that was poorly received, then she may be reticent to being so forthcoming and open about the subject this time around. Again, this one boils down to her needing to trust her man and not yet being comfortable enough to do so.
- For some women lying is a way to bridge the gap between reality and the ideal they want for their lives. In their minds, it’s a mechanism for keeping that ideal alive because in the end, the only bad lie is one that hurts her relationships.
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