Top 5 Signs that She’s a Gold-digger
- She talks excessively about luxury goods - like the Hermès Birkin that are not commensurate with her income level.
- She never offers to pay - A friend of mine recalls taking a girl out on a date, and when they stepped out of the car, he gently reminded her that she forgot her purse, to which she replied, “Oh, I don’t need it.” Not that he wasn’t going to pay for everything anyway, but the expectation can be off-putting.
- She has expensive taste - A physician friend was super-excited about reconnecting with a high-school crush, but was equally disappointed when she only showed enthusiasm if the date involved going a Laker game, a concert, or expensive restaurants. If two people want to have a long-term relationship, they should care about each other’s financial well-being and encourage responsible behavior.
- She has a history of accepting extravagant gifts - Chances are this is not her first rodeo. Is she decked out in expensive clothing/jewelry that she obviously couldn’t afford herself? Whether they are from a wealth ex or generous parents, the key is a expecting others to buy material things for her.
- She acts like an auditor on the 1st date – Wealthy men are (rightfully) sensitive about inquiries into their financials. If things get serious, then both people should offer full financial disclosure, especially regarding student loan and credit card debt.
Some of the other commenters recommend hiding the wealth. I’m not sure an act of deception is a good way to start the relationship. Also, unless you have no social networking presence, people can find out a lot about you through social media.
A Practical Solution
My top 5 list was kind of in jest – if a person acts that obvious, then shame on her for having no game. This may seem overly simplistic, but the most effective way to weed out gold-diggers is to look for women who are invested in their careers with a pro-social slant: healthcare professionals, teachers, even animal shelter volunteers (maybe not the PETA type who assaults a stranger for wearing a mink coat). Sure, as some of the comments suggest, a “good” gold-digger can hide her true motives, but I doubt that she’s going to “pretend” to work at a veterinarian just to fake her potential husband out.
I would venture to guess that a gold-digger, whose main purpose is to score a rich boyfriend/husband, is more likely to be unemployed, minimally employed, or casually employed. Now that I think of it, the one time I dated a “part-time model”, who never seem to have real gigs, things did not go well . Let’s just say I never thought I’d have anything to do with the FBI in mundane life. Then again, the signs were all there: She had an apartment in Newport Beach, drove a Lexus, and check this, bought a dog and named him “Chopard” (after the Swiss luxury brand). Now I just need to wait for someone to post the question, “What’s it like dating a gold-digger” and I can share the story.
Note 1: The follow-up story: Jonathan Chen's answer to What does it feel like to date a gold digger?
Note 2: For the record, I’m see nothing wrong with gold-digging: Jonathan Chen's answer to Why is there such a stigma surrounding the idea that a woman might want a guy who can financially afford to give her a comfortable, secure life?
From Your Quora Digest
No comments:
Post a Comment