I'LL MISS SEYA

Please pardon me for this unedited text. I could not run a spell check on Seya's speech because it would `lose meaning.'

During An Interview
PRESS: Mr Seya, a lot has been said accusing you of crossing to NRM. What's your take?

SEYA: You know when many insects are walking, one off is kaasa so am kaasa (meaning eyawukana ko mugendo efuuka kaasa}

PRESS: Seya, thank God you are still alive. What do you want to say about your sickness?

SEYA: It's none of my business. My doctors talk for my disease. I do not die because I fear the coffin.

PRESS: I thought Muslims are not buried in coffins?

SEYA: You are not the one who born me (to mean you didn't produce me). My busiiramu doesn't touch on you.

PRESS: Why had you refused to talk to the press?

SEYA: I'm still too dead to talk to the press now
His Quotes During the elections
"The erection of the president is determined by the women because they are the majority"

About how Mao cheated him during DP primaries; -"He cheated on me during voting of erections, he used children to erect him, and when I ask him, he says those are the bakonjo pigmies from the country of Kasese. Otherwise it was insobokable (kyali tekisoboka) for him to won."
During his fights with Mabikke;- "I don't know his father and not even his parents"

Questioned whether he was born in Kampala City;- "No, no I was born here in Kampala; in Kisaasi, just 3km ago (for 3km away)."

When he started his own party; "First, I will make a speech in English then in our local government (to mean local language)"

Asked whether he was of age to stand for President, "Mr Mayor, are you 63 yrs old"? No, no, no, am not sixty fili. My mother born me in 1947 and …aaahh…that makes me sixty fili yrs. Yes, you are right."

His experiences during the presidential campaign tours -During the presidential campaign tours, the man didn't disappoint, he threw everyone in rib cracking laughter. Like when he was told to address the people of Akokoro and how happy he was to see them excited to meet Museveni, this is what he said: "I am surprising you are very many and am happy that we are being happy times. Because the other time I came, we were condolences." Did he want to say they were mourning the last time he was there? Hmnnn

His relationship with Desire Luzinda:-Leave us alone because those are our private parts. We can't share them in pubic.

About his life at Oxford University; -"You know at foxford, soxford, fosord…until the interviewer stepped in to help.

When asked who stopped him while he was driving;- "Can you imagine the police man who stopped me is even a woman?"

When he came late for a conference; "Hajji nga you are late?
Seya; You know we had a punctual (read puncture) because the ball of the car burst on the way.

While parked at a certain place with a parking notice that read "Vehicle parked at owner's Risk". Then he was trying to give directions for someone who wanted to meet him. Instead Seya told him "Find me here parked at Owners Risk." Heheh