Thursday, July 21, 2011

10 Signs You’ve Spent Too Much Time at a Public Hotspot

By admin on July 20, 2011

It happens. You’re cramming for finals or working on a business proposal. Perhaps you’ve been doing research online for a term paper, or been engrossed in an effort to author the next Great American Novel. Something’s been keeping you busy on that laptop for months, so you never see the writing on the wall. Then it happens.

You discover that you may very well have overstayed your welcome at your favorite WiFi hotspot. How did you not see this coming? Well, here’s a list of clues for you – 10 signs that you’ve spent too much time at your favorite public WiFi hotspot:

They’ve named a menu item after you. This is a fairly good indication that you’ve become a fixture at Cafe Latte Da. If it comes with free refills, you may need to reconsider your purchasing habits.
You’ve ordered every other item on the menu at least twice. But you’ve never ordered more than one item on any one visit. Way to milk it there, big spender.
Tech Support has your phone number listed as 1-800-Java-Hut. Not that it’s your fault, mind you. You had to give them another callback number when your iPhone went dead right in the middle of a service call. That leads us to clue #3:
Your iPhone battery runs out before your first order of coffee does. This, by the way, is further proof that you need to re-assess your policy about paying for your table. Seriously.
You researched colleges online, right at this very table, after graduating from John Adams High School. Now you’re a post-grad student, and still haven’t spent enough here to cover your electricity usage.
Halfway through Chapter 1, your servers changed shifts … twice. OK, so you’re not exactly on pace with Danielle Steele, but so what? She doesn’t have a bagel with her name on it either.
You’ve been offered a job – as their night cleaner. Of course, this could have been precipitated by the fact that your table has enough used napkins and sugar packets on it by the end of the day to fill a trash can.
The AC outlet near your usual table was covered with a No Loitering sign. Not that you’ve overstayed your welcome or anything. It’s probably just an odd coincidence, except:
There’s now a jukebox plugged into your outlet. And call us cynical, but the fact that there are nothing but Rebecca Black and Justin Bieber songs on it can’t be a good sign. Then again, the No Loitering sign, which is now tucked prominently in the menu holder on your table, is definitely not a good sign.
Off-Peak Hours are defined as “whenever you’re not there”. The hints have become a bit blunt here, so it may be time to shop for new office space. Just make sure to update your contact info with Tech Support.